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文︰黃勺嫚，影像無國界導師 | Text: Wong Cheuk-man, Teaching Artist of All About Us
英譯︰黃澄楓 | English Translation: Janice Wong
DotDot Alfs Bryan Pabellan，我們喚他Bryan。他有圓滾滾的眼睛，像兔子的上頷。有時會喚他Dot Dot，聽上來更切合他趣緻的樣子。Bryan現年十七歲，是出生於香港的菲律賓人。不過，他只到過菲律賓兩次。記得第一次到達時，他發現菲律賓原來不如香港繁華。
儘管Bryan對菲律賓文化感到陌生，但他如大部份菲律賓人喜歡音樂，富有節奏感和音樂天份。他的父親是樂手，家族裡有人吹色士風和小號，他和姐姐也懂得彈鋼琴。他喜歡廣東歌，會聽張敬軒的音樂，還懂得唱張國榮的《追》。儘管不明白歌詞，但他仍然覺得感動。他說爸爸媽媽非常old-fashioned，因為他們家裡會保留著卡式帶播放器，聽The Beatles 和 Bee Gees的音樂，留著VHS錄影帶來看電影。Bryan說他對電影、音樂的興趣與他的童年有很大關係。他記得小學的時候，去了菲律賓探望重病的爸爸，回港後要待新學年才能上學。每日無所事事，便去表哥家裡看電影。表哥會放不同時代、不同類型的電影給他們看，連經典電影《大國民》他也看過。一說起《大國民》我們便不約而同說出Rosebud。電影最後一幕，主角Kane說完Rosebud便逝去。我們互問對方Rosebud是什麼意思。他說Rosebud代表了主角難忘所失去的童真，因為主角小時侯被父母遺棄時，遺留在雪地的滑雪板名叫Rosebud。他說他看第二次才明白。那時他不到十歲，卻有著細膩的情感。
DotDot Alfs Bryan Pabellan – Bryan for short – has round eyes and a pouty, rabbit-like mouth. Sometimes we call him Dot Dot, a cute nickname to match his cute face. He is a 17-year-old Hong Kong-born Filipino. He has only been to the Philippines twice, and he was surprised to find the country much less vibrant than Hong Kong.
Born and raised here, Bryan considers himself a Hongkonger. His Filipino classmates feel more connected to the Philippines – that was because they had plenty of gatherings with family and friends, according to him, which allowed them to share the culture. Bryan, however, didn’t have that. His parents both died of sickness, leaving behind him and two elder sisters. His family is not as lively as others, making it harder for him to reconnect with his roots. Of course, he is aware that other Hongkongers may not consider them as locals. Some older ones are even hostile – Bryan has been yelled at for bumping into someone by accident. Living in Tuen Mun for many years, he still hasn’t managed to make friends with neighbours. Once a neighbour asked if he could help check a child’s English homework, and he said yes. That was the end of that conversation.
Despite his disconnection with his own culture, Bryan loves music. Like many Filipinos, he was born with innate rhythm and musical talent. His father was a musician, a relative plays saxophone and trumpet, while he and his sisters play piano. He likes Canto-pop, especially Hins Cheung, and he knows every note to Leslie Cheung’s classic – Chase. He doesn’t understand the lyrics but it is still moving. His parents were old-fashioned, he noted. They played The Beatles and Bee Gees on cassette tape and watch movies on VHS. His interest in films and music was greatly fueled by his childhood. When he was in primary school, he visited the Philippines to see his sick father. When he returned, he had to wait until the new school year begins. He had a lot of time on his hands, so he went to his cousin’s and watched movies all day. His cousin played classics of different periods and genres, such as the masterpiece Citizen Kane. Talking about the movie, we both mentioned Kane’s last words: rosebud. That was the last scene of the movie, which ended as Kane died. We asked each other what rosebud meant. To him, it represented lost innocence. He pointed out when Kane was abandoned by his parents, the snowboard left in the snow was called Rosebud. He admitted it took him a second viewing to understand the line. He was only ten years old at that time but his sensitivity was beyond his age.
Other than watching movies and playing music, he also wants to act. He has consider applying to the school of drama at the Hong Kong Academy of Performance Arts after DSE, but he knows for someone not fluent in Cantonese, his chances are slim. However, he isn’t bummed. He also likes writing, and wants to delve into journalism. On the other hand, Ratatouille made him want to become a food critic. He even wanted to be a cleaner when he was in kindergarten. Open-minded, he is willing to try anything. Of course, living in Hong Kong is not easy and he knows that. That’s why he works a part-time job at a supermarket to make ends meet. To him, it is yet another interesting experience.
When our group had a meeting in the music room, the first piece Bryan played was from Spirited Away. Knowing him better now, I understood why he liked that movie – it was a coming-of-age story, and I hope he will grow up brave and well, just like Chihiro.