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文︰黃勺嫚，影像無國界導師 | Text: Wong Cheuk-man, Teaching Artist of All About Us
英譯︰黃澄楓 | English Translation: Janice Wong
Bryan正與組員討論拍攝事宜 Bryan was discussing the short film production with his group mates
DotDot Alfs Bryan Pabellan，我們喚他Bryan。他有圓滾滾的眼睛，像兔子的上頷。有時會喚他Dot Dot，聽上來更切合他趣緻的樣子。Bryan現年十七歲，是出生於香港的菲律賓人。不過，他只到過菲律賓兩次。記得第一次到達時，他發現菲律賓原來不如香港繁華。
Bryan在香港出生和成長，他直言自己是一個香港人。他說其他菲律賓同學對菲律賓人身份有更多認同，因為他們有很多親朋戚友的聚會，一聚首便身在菲律賓文化。可是，Bryan的父母先後因病離世，他與兩個姐姐同住，家庭不如其他菲律賓家庭熱鬧，所以他較少機會接觸菲律賓文化，自然較少認同菲律賓人的身份。當然，他知道香港人不易視他們為香港的一份子。他說年長的香港人，總是對他們充滿敵意。有時不小心輕微踫撞，也被人罵得狗血淋頭。住在屯門十多年的他，也沒有相熟的鄰居。他記得曾有鄰居問他可不可以幫忙檢查小孩的英文功課，Bryan當然說好，但最後卻不了了之。
儘管Bryan對菲律賓文化感到陌生，但他如大部份菲律賓人喜歡音樂，富有節奏感和音樂天份。他的父親是樂手，家族裡有人吹色士風和小號，他和姐姐也懂得彈鋼琴。他喜歡廣東歌，會聽張敬軒的音樂，還懂得唱張國榮的《追》。儘管不明白歌詞，但他仍然覺得感動。他說爸爸媽媽非常old-fashioned，因為他們家裡會保留著卡式帶播放器，聽The Beatles 和 Bee Gees的音樂，留著VHS錄影帶來看電影。Bryan說他對電影、音樂的興趣與他的童年有很大關係。他記得小學的時候，去了菲律賓探望重病的爸爸，回港後要待新學年才能上學。每日無所事事，便去表哥家裡看電影。表哥會放不同時代、不同類型的電影給他們看，連經典電影《大國民》他也看過。一說起《大國民》我們便不約而同說出Rosebud。電影最後一幕，主角Kane說完Rosebud便逝去。我們互問對方Rosebud是什麼意思。他說Rosebud代表了主角難忘所失去的童真，因為主角小時侯被父母遺棄時，遺留在雪地的滑雪板名叫Rosebud。他說他看第二次才明白。那時他不到十歲，卻有著細膩的情感。
Bryan is shooting with his group mates 與組員拍攝中的Bryan
除了看電影、玩音樂，他也想做演員。他想過考完中學文憑試以後，報讀香港演藝學院戲劇系，但不擅廣東話能考入的機會很低。不過他沒有失望，很快又說自己喜歡寫東西，想嘗試讀新聞系、做記者。看過《五星級大鼠》後，還想做美食評論家。讀幼稚園時，更想過做清潔員。難得他仍保持開放的心態，容許自己嘗試不同的事物。當然，他知道在香港生活不容易，為了幫補家庭的開支，他也正在超級市場做兼職，但是他覺得很好玩。
記得，我們組在學校的音樂室開會時，第一次聽Bryan彈奏的是《千與千尋》的配樂。了解他更多以後，覺得他喜歡《千與千尋》也不無原因。《千與千尋》是關於成長，希望他也像千尋般，學會勇敢。
DotDot Alfs Bryan Pabellan – Bryan for short – has round eyes and a pouty, rabbit-like mouth. Sometimes we call him Dot Dot, a cute nickname to match his cute face. He is a 17-year-old Hong Kong-born Filipino. He has only been to the Philippines twice, and he was surprised to find the country much less vibrant than Hong Kong.
Born and raised here, Bryan considers himself a Hongkonger. His Filipino classmates feel more connected to the Philippines – that was because they had plenty of gatherings with family and friends, according to him, which allowed them to share the culture. Bryan, however, didn’t have that. His parents both died of sickness, leaving behind him and two elder sisters. His family is not as lively as others, making it harder for him to reconnect with his roots. Of course, he is aware that other Hongkongers may not consider them as locals. Some older ones are even hostile – Bryan has been yelled at for bumping into someone by accident. Living in Tuen Mun for many years, he still hasn’t managed to make friends with neighbours. Once a neighbour asked if he could help check a child’s English homework, and he said yes. That was the end of that conversation.
Bryan 與其他營友分享有關拍攝短片的想法與感受 Bryan shared his thought and feeling on film production in the last day of camp
Despite his disconnection with his own culture, Bryan loves music. Like many Filipinos, he was born with innate rhythm and musical talent. His father was a musician, a relative plays saxophone and trumpet, while he and his sisters play piano. He likes Canto-pop, especially Hins Cheung, and he knows every note to Leslie Cheung’s classic – Chase. He doesn’t understand the lyrics but it is still moving. His parents were old-fashioned, he noted. They played The Beatles and Bee Gees on cassette tape and watch movies on VHS. His interest in films and music was greatly fueled by his childhood. When he was in primary school, he visited the Philippines to see his sick father. When he returned, he had to wait until the new school year begins. He had a lot of time on his hands, so he went to his cousin’s and watched movies all day. His cousin played classics of different periods and genres, such as the masterpiece Citizen Kane. Talking about the movie, we both mentioned Kane’s last words: rosebud. That was the last scene of the movie, which ended as Kane died. We asked each other what rosebud meant. To him, it represented lost innocence. He pointed out when Kane was abandoned by his parents, the snowboard left in the snow was called Rosebud. He admitted it took him a second viewing to understand the line. He was only ten years old at that time but his sensitivity was beyond his age.
Other than watching movies and playing music, he also wants to act. He has consider applying to the school of drama at the Hong Kong Academy of Performance Arts after DSE, but he knows for someone not fluent in Cantonese, his chances are slim. However, he isn’t bummed. He also likes writing, and wants to delve into journalism. On the other hand, Ratatouille made him want to become a food critic. He even wanted to be a cleaner when he was in kindergarten. Open-minded, he is willing to try anything. Of course, living in Hong Kong is not easy and he knows that. That’s why he works a part-time job at a supermarket to make ends meet. To him, it is yet another interesting experience.
When our group had a meeting in the music room, the first piece Bryan played was from Spirited Away. Knowing him better now, I understood why he liked that movie – it was a coming-of-age story, and I hope he will grow up brave and well, just like Chihiro.
Bryan (左二) 與組員們 Bryan (second left) and his group mates